[mikeymc93]

I know of a man who lost all contact with one of his very good friends after she bought a BMW 520d ...

When he saw it he said " Whats the difference between a BMW and a Hedgehog ? "

" A hedgehog has the pricks on the outside "

 

[Mk2McG]

QUOTE (Scirocco-10-C-9516 @ Jul 23 2010, 05:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>I know of a man who lost all contact with one of his very good friends after she bought a BMW 520d ...

When he saw it he said " Whats the difference between a BMW and a Hedgehog ? "

" A hedgehog has the pricks on the outside "

the thread says Good Jokes

 

[Brian.G]

2204355

Clock that into google and hit Im feeling lucky.

 

[GT130 eoin]

QUOTE (Brian.G @ Jul 24 2010, 12:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>2204355

Clock that into google and hit Im feeling lucky.

ya would love to just kick him in the sack..

 

[rob_87]

What kind of bees give you milk??

BOOBIES!!

 

[Mk2McG]

QUOTE (GT130 eoin @ Jul 24 2010, 12:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

ya would love to just kick him in the sack..

Yeah

 

[Micky 32]

Mr. Smith, in charge of a large office, is having to make some cutbacks to save money. He can't decide who to get rid of, Jack or Debbie. They're both good at their jobs, but he can manage with only one of them. He decides to give each a chance to convince him they should be the one to stay. So he calls Debbie into his office...

"Debbie", he says "I have a problem. I'm going to have to either lay you or Jack off"

Debbie replies, "well, I'd rather you jacked off if it's all the same to you, I've got a bit of a headache"

 

[euro-star]

a 19 year old guy is walking down the street when a sign in a shop window catches his attention-
sign reads, hot dogs 2.50, burgars 3.50 and hand jobs 25.00

the chap has a quick look around before he hurries inside.

when he's inside he see's this fit blondie chick with massive tits and overall lookin class.

chap walks up to her and says- are you the girl who gives handjobs for 25quid???

yes- says the bird,

WELL WASH YOUR FCUKIN HANDS AND GET ME A HOT DOG!!!

MOD EDIT.

 

[lynchie2k9]

blonde takes her broken car to be repaired fearing an expensive bill. but the mechanic fixes it in 2 mins ."nothing serious love just shit in the air filter. she replies" really? how often do i have to do that

 

[lynchie2k9]

when phil was asked for a password for his new computer he typed in "penis" to impress his partner sarah but she luaghed even harder when the computer replied rejected "not long enough"

 

[mk2-lover]

Those are class

 

[Micky 32]

How do you know when the honeymoon is over??

When you're shaving she walks in and takes a shit!!

 

[boris gttdi]

QUOTE (Micky 32 @ Aug 19 2010, 01:16 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>How do you know when the honeymoon is over??

When you're shaving she walks in and takes a shit!!

Funny but true !!

 

[GT130 eoin]

A man and his wife are having sex when their 10 year old son walks in and screams, "Oh my God!" The husband says, "I'll go to his room and explain to him what was going on. "When the father walks in, he finds his son having sex with his grandmother. The father screams "Oh my God!!!" "Yeah," the son replies, "It's not so funny when it's YOUR mother!" Ha!!

 

[Mark'sGotDubs]

A goat walks into a job centre and asks in perfect English for help finding a job. The man at the desk is a bit stunned but looks through his files. "I could get you a job at the circus" He offers. "The circus?" replies the goat, "Why would the circus need a bricklayer?".

 

[Jimmy Diesel Junior]

What's the difference between pride and stress???

Pride is when your son is the Munster Hooker.

Stress is when your daughter is the Leinster Hooker.

 

[G4V11N]

 

[cliffperse]

QUOTE (Mark'sGotDubs @ Sep 9 2010, 07:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>A goat walks into a job centre and asks in perfect English for help finding a job. The man at the desk is a bit stunned but looks through his files. "I could get you a job at the circus" He offers. "The circus?" replies the goat, "Why would the circus need a bricklayer?".

 

[DonalM]

When the nurse was bathing a female patient who had been in a coma for many months, she noticed a reaction when placing a sponge between her legs. When the doctor was notified, he called the husband and asked him to report to the hospital immediately. Upon his arrival the doctor explained that the nurse had seen a reaction when her private parts were stimulated. He suggested that the husband should have oral sex with her because it might lead to improvement in her condition. After about 15 minutes the husband came out of her room and announced that she was dead!

"How did that happen?" asked the doctor.

"I think she choked to death," said the husband.

 

[Dev]

What do you call a woman with one leg?
Eileen

What do you call a woman with no legs?
Noleen

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the sea?
Bob